


The accidental voyeur

by Adara_Rose



Series: DA2: The Champion and the Viscount [3]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Awkward Sexual Situations, Awkwardness, Library Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2015-11-29
Packaged: 2018-05-04 01:30:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5315126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adara_Rose/pseuds/Adara_Rose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hawke walks in on something she wishes to hell she hadn't seen and is thoroughly traumatised. Cue Varric to the rescue!</p>
            </blockquote>





	The accidental voyeur

Varric could hear Hawke long before he saw her. The thundering footsteps were a dead giveaway, as were the speed they were approaching at. He sighed deeply and put the quill aside. He had just managed to put the stopper in the ink pot when she stormed in, all blond hair and wild eyes.

“Varric!” She bawled like a giant with a stubbed toe as she threw herself into the nearest chair. It creaked ominously under her weight. “Tell me a story!”

“Hello to you too, Hawke. Nice to see you, Varric. What can I do for you, Hawke?” Varric said, sarcastically. Hawke ignored him, pulling at her blond tresses in a feverish manner.

“Tell me a story!” She bleated like a lost sheep. The wild look in her eyes intensified. Varric sighed deeply.

“Not until you calm down and tell me what has you in such a state.” He ordered. She whimpered, staring at the bottle of wine on the table like it was a lifeline. He sighed and handed it to her.

After having downed about half of the wine in about three gulps, she seemed to have calmed down enough to be content with whimpering like a kicked mabari puppy. The look in her eyes matted somewhat, and she was almost coherent as she keened:

“I can never go home again!” Well now, that did not sound like the Hawke he knew. The Hawke he knew was the sort of woman for whom the sky’s the limit and most of the time not even that. The woman sitting in front of him now was nearly unrecognisable, the way she panted like another kicked mabari puppy. Varric seriously considered breaking out the strong stuff.

“Come now Hawke” he tried again. “Surely it’s not that bad.”

“No” she agreed, whimpering like a third kicked mabari puppy, “it’s worse!” She buried her face in her hands, making a muffled noise somewhere between a sob and a hysterical laugh. Varric patted her knee awkwardly.

“There, there” he soothed, “you haven’t been this upset since Donnic eloped with Carver the night before his wedding to Aveline.” Hawke made that noise again, her shoulders shaking. The hands covering her face made it very hard to understand what she was saying, but he caught something about the library, the maker, and awkwardness.

“Come again?”

Hawke looked up at him through her fingers, eyes still having some of that wildness in them.

“I said” she sobbed, “that I was just going to the library for a book to read and I walked in on Caelan and Anders fucking on the library floor!” She laughed hysterically. “At least I never need to speculate over who does the actual fucking again!”

Varric patted her knee again, this time consolingly.

“Did they see you?” He asked after a suitable amount of time had passed.

“No, thank the Maker, Anders was too damn busy clawing at Caelan’s back and moaning like a well-paid whore and Caelan - well -” she whimpered again, looking pained. “Oh maker!” Varric considered asking for details. Then he decided that it was better to make Isabela do it. She could talk Hawke into practically anything, and she would be more than happy to pass on whatever she had learned.

“Breathe, Hawke” he ordered. “I’ll tell you a story.” He pulled out the papers he had been working on when she stormed in. “How about the latest installment of _Hard in Hightown_?” He didn’t realise his mistake until another hysterical wail tore from Hawke’s throat. Varric sighed. “Or I’ll just… get you some more wine.”

 

 


End file.
